JDP

A while back I wrote a piece tilted: Show Me Your Friends, I will show you your future. I also went so far to say that if you are what you eat, you are who you hang around; echoing the old saying that birds of a feather flock together. My hypothesis must have caught a lot of peoples’ attention. Recently, I read an article where Will Smith, is making the argument that your salary will be the average of your five closet friends’ income. Now before you get sad and cry, don’t leave your current friends in pursuit to find new ones. Mr. Smith’s theory has not been proven to be true.

Nonetheless, everyone is talking about the power of relationships and the effects it can have on our lives. I wish I could say it’s because of me, but I cannot. Regardless, of the reason, I want to explore this a little more. Today I want to ask the following questions: What is this relationship doing to me? What is it doing for me?

Other than your attitude your greatest assets and liabilities are your friends. It’s not what you know, but who you know. Since the launch of social sites such as Facebook, twitter, Myspace, and many others, social capitalism has increased and has become the “IT” thing. People actually care who you can connect yourself with. If you can’t get a job done, it’s good to know someone that knows someone that can. However, on a personal level, are we in the best relationships for ourselves?

We’ve selected some relationships because of need and have stayed in them because of comfort. Dead relationships that are not progressing are idle. They apply the least amount of effort and lackluster energy. These tend to be relationships that we lose ourselves in. The one where we look back upon and say, “Who was I?” We need not lose ourselves in current relationships that are holding us back from fulfilling our purpose. Rather than losing ourselves in an attempt to hold on to spiritless flesh, we need to remember who we where before we met them and RUN from that situation. Don’t jog, skip, or crawl. You need to run.

Undeniably, many of us have fallen into bad relationships that are prohibiting us from going up and reaching our purpose in life. I strongly believe that relationships should take you places, however, none of those places should be dead-ends. We have to quickly learn the following lessons: who we can count on and who we should count out. People will use you, if you allow yourself to be used and will not pour anything back into you. They will leave you empty and drained physically, emotional, and mentally.

Had it not been because of relationships, I would not be sharing these thoughts with you. I have people in my life that see more within me then I ever could imagine alone. Had it not been because of relationships, I would not have ever spoken at EMU last week. Yes, I’m good and I deserved it, however, it was a friend that put me in that situation. Maybe even more so because I was a person he could count on than my own abilities. Had it not been because of relationships, the world my never know my name. A good friend developed my website as a gift because he believed in my gift and felt that I should share it with others.

I challenge you to take a relationship you’re currently in, one that you are totally satisfied with and one that you are unsatisfied with and finish the following statement with your own words…”because of this relationship I am………”

I’m blessed to have relationships that are pushing me closer to my dreams. But I’m only here because I left the relations that were pulling on me and wearing me down. Relationships are weapons that can be used to build or destroy. Regardless of the use, the target is always you.

If you’ve end up at a place where you no longer recognize yourself and have ended up at a destination that is not of your choosing, someone has misguided you, and only a true friend can get you back to where you used to be. Only a true friend can show you….YOU.

JDP